23 Nov 2006

The Strange Case Of Alicia Rhodes And The Disappearing Accent

For whatever reason, there are dozens of satellite TV stations over here in the UK that carry sex chat line shows. You watch a girl or girls sitting down and you ring them up and, for about £45 per minute, you can talk dirty with them. But you can’t watch them do anything more dirty than lick their own nipples due to broadcasting laws. They’re complete shit. Why anyone would bother watching or using them is a complete mystery to me, but there you go.

See, Alicia isn`t necessarily the prettiest porn star around. But like many great pornstars, it was her manner as much as her looks and figure (which I think are pretty hot anyway) that made her stand out. She stood out in a sea of models desperately trying to stop themselves from falling asleep as some sticky-fingered bloke on the other end of the line muttered not-so-sweet nothings down the line to them.

Imagine my surprise after witnessing her in many distinctly softcore nightly TV offerings at discovering she was about as far from softcore as you can get. My odyssey of porn reviewing took me to sites like DVDBox, 99bb, VideoZ and Adult Movie Club where I was surprised to see her name appear in titles such as Attack Of The 15" Cocks, Look What`s Up My Ass 4 and Old Fat Fucks, Filthy Young Sluts.

Was this really the same young lady that wasn`t even allowed to say `cock` on the TV station she regularly appeared on? Such questions were answered in no uncertain terms after I saw her have literally buckets of cum unceremoniously emptied over her in title after title, and have every orifice fucked quite impossibly hard. But then, on the rare occasions that she got a chance to talk, I noticed something else peculiar. Where had her English accent gone?

I listened carefully and sure enough - she was trotting out a not-at-all bad Californian accent. What`s going on here?! All sorts of questions spring to mind here - did the producers ask her to put the accent on? Did they think viewers would appreciate an American accent? If so, why? And did she or they think people wouldn`t notice? I`ve seen other British stars in American porn before, but they were speaking in their native tongue.

What makes it a shame is that, like me, she is originally from Manchester. Admittedly, the Mancunian accent isn`t the sexiest in the world - but doesn`t, "Come on, fuck that ass hard and cum all over my fucking face!" have pretty much the same impact however you say it?

Posted by Steve 21:07:27