10 Jan 2008

Thief Gets Kicked Stealing Porn

They might as well have just published the victim's adress!

Many people's worst fears are dying. Or, as Jerry Seinfeld once revealed, some people actually fear speaking in public than dying - they'd prefer to be in the casket rather than doing the eulogy, as he pointed out.

But one of my worst fears would be what happened to the resident of a house in Euless in the USA on New Year's Day - a burglar broke into their home and stole all their porn. About $300 worth. That's a lot of porn!

Just how would you explain to the police that the only thing the burglar stole was porn?

"They didn't steal anything else?"

"Erm, no, officer."

"Just porn?"

"Yes."

"Not even the Picasso you have in your lounge?"

"No."

"That must have been some badass porn."

It would just be, perhaps, the most embarrassing thing of all time. But I'm intrigued by this particular burglar, I must say - the fact that they took the trouble to break into somebody's house just to steal porn and left all the valuables!

I'd like to think it's some kind of burglar on a crusade to clean up the homes of everyone in America by stealing their porn from them and then hiding it some warehouse somewhere. Then, when they've filled the warehouse with porn, they'll blow it all up. In a massive porn-splosion.

Or they could just be a complete weirdo, I suppose.

Posted by Steve 13:55:00